What is Success?
There's is a question that I ask a lot, that I find fascinating and that's why I started a whole podcast about it!
That question is: What is Success? On the podcast we'll be exploring the stories we tell ourselves about success and the types of breakthroughs that allow us to create an identity around our most exciting vision of success.
For me that vision has changed tremendously over time and even the type of success I thought was possible has changed so much over time, so what does success even mean?
It's important that each of us define success for ourselves because when we do that what’s possible for us starts to change.
What's your big vision?
What I found the first time my coach asked me, "What do you really want to create in your life?” was that actually beyond a few small things I didn’t really have a big vision for what I wanted. But starting to get specific was my first step to being able to do more, and be more of the person I want to be. It was my first step of deciding my purpose and being able to say, "This is what I want. This is why it matters. This is what success looks like for me at this stage in my life."
And for so long I lived without that. And looking back I know now that this is why there have been times on my journey where I really have gone after things, poured myself into them and then realized, "I don’t even know why I‘m doing this. I am living out a story that isn’t even mine.”
It was an idea of success that I had absorbed and pursued but fundamentally didn’t feel right to me. So it’s also very important to identify where your story of success is coming from. Is it really your vision or one that was handed to you by your family or your peer group or your partner?
It's honestly hard work defining it for yourself, but you have to start by asking yourself, "What are my true genuine desires? What would I be delighted to create? What would I be delighted to experience? Who would I most like to become?”
Success is not what you think you should be, not what you think you should want, but really taking the time to answer, "What does a successful life look like to me?"
It is so important that you create a definition of success that enables you to start to feel today the emotions that your vision of success will give you. Think about it. If your success is just tied to an outcome, it’s always out of reach. Whenever you put anything in between where you are and how you want to feel, you're slowing yourself down.
When you tie your success to a specific outcome you're always delaying feeling the very emotion that you need to feel in order to create the outcome you desire.
When you're setting big extraordinary goals for yourself, they may not work out the way you hope, but who you become in that process, how much you learn, allows you to expand, and to know so much more about where you want to go next.
You need to connect as much as possible to those feelings now in order to create the outcome that you want.
But to do that is work. And that’s where coaching comes in to help us stay rooted our vision while taking the leap toward your next vision of success.
Notice I said “your next vision” because the more we move toward what we want that fully aligns with what we value and who we are and how we want to show up in the world, that vision will change.
So one of the things I am really excited about with my podcast is to talk to people about their definition of success. Just in the conversations getting ready for this launch there have been some really good ones:
Success is always being ready to show up as your best.
Success is not giving up.
Success is doing things that you really enjoy every day.
Success is overcoming fear and showing up with optimism in the face of great odds.
Success is learning something new each day.
Do you notice how a lot of these also involve courage?
For me, success is having the courage to go for what I want.
In “The Obstacle is the Way” by Ryan Holiday he defines courage stripped down to its simplest form as taking action. And sometimes that can be the hardest thing.
A lot of us want to skip over this step and somehow arrive at success without ever being uncomfortable. But sometimes it just feels awful. The bigger the desire, the more you have to reach beyond what you’ve done before, even though you’re worrying whether you’re going to be good enough, you’re telling yourself nobody is going to like it, how you’re going to make a fool of yourself.
Some of us high achievers have associated success with working really hard, I did this for years. I think it’s important that you define success for yourself in such a way that makes you excited about pursuing it, rather than draining you. That’s why I now intentionally pursue my goals in a way that allows me to feel successful every day, and to have fun along the way.
So, what about you? What’s your vision of success? Make sure whatever your answer is, it is an answer that makes you light up inside and find a way to experience even a little bit of that each day.
Maybe yours sounds similar to mine. Or maybe it’s something completely different. Whatever it is, it’s meaningful and valid because it’s the life you’re yearning for - and the reason I created this podcast is with you in mind. Because I want to support you to build a business and life that feels most meaningful to you, true to you, so you can have the most positive impact in the world. And the first place to start is to get super specific on what that actually looks and feels like.
So get specific. Write it down. Let it be your anchor and your guide - especially when the noise of the world may try to distract you, tell you what it is you should really be wanting and pursuing.
Don’t let that diminish your big vision and goals. Be brave enough to run in the direction of a life that feels most meaningful and true to you.
More than anything, know that I’m rooting for you and I’m here by your side cheering you on every step of the way.
Listen to the full Episode:
Mentioned in this Episode:
Take the Success Quiz: https://www.storytonic.co/success-advantage
Coaching with Nathalie https://www.storytonic.co/
"The Obstacle Is The Way" by Ryan Holiday
Listen to the Podcast: https://www.storytonic.co/podcasts/your-success-tonic-podcast
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